Dorian Gray and the present-day beauty ideal

“I never approve, or disapprove, of anything now. It is an absurd attitude to take towards life. We are not sent into the world to air our moral prejudices. I never take any notice of what common people say, and I never interfere with what charming people do.” – Oscar Wilde, Dorian Gray (New York 2011) 71.

To remain young and beautiful forever: is there anyone who hasn’t wondered if there is a way to do just that? To not grow old, to not bear the marks of the life you live, have lived. What if you could simply live the life you wished, without having to pay the consequences? What if your life didn’t have to have meaning, could be completely wasted away, as long as it’s been a beautiful life?

Beauty is an integrated part of our society: it is literally everywhere. It’s in the commercials, in theatres, the media, it is everywhere. However, there is a danger to all this. Just as in Dorian Gray, where the aesthetic lifestyle is at the heart of the book, the modern day beauty industry rules a large part of our lives: “follow the ideals, the norms, and you’ll have an amazing life if you do”. Both Dorian and a lot of men and women in our society today followed those ideals, but at what cost? The thesis I will present in this article is the following: “Striving towards the big beauty ideas as Dorian Gray strived towards the perfect aesthetic life, without moral regards or boundaries, causes the seeker to neglect themselves and  risk emerging more ugly then before their search began”. I will present this thesis by comparing The Picture of Dorian Gray to the present day beauty-industry and the consequences that the ideals have on the society.

In The Picture of Dorian Gray, the aesthetic lifestyle is advocated by lord Henry Wotton, an older gentleman who is rather somewhat of a critique of the time and world he lived in.[1] Throughout the book he gives several speeches, making both Dorian and the reader question what they knew before. The aesthetic philosophy is based in the simplistic beauty of things, yet, while pursuing an aesthetic lifestyle, one may come out uglier than before. [2] How is this any different from thousands of women trying to become the beauty ideal that is spread throughout society? The media always shows the same picture: healthy, thin/skinny young woman, flawless skin, beautiful shining hair, shining white teeth, flawless in every way. And if the models are not flawless enough yet underneath all their make-up and other cosmetic aids, there is always photo shop to finish the pictures with some glorious editing, making the woman in the pictures even more perfect: taller, bigger breasts, smaller waist and more of those adaptions. These images are everywhere, the influence is inescapable. Thousands of young girls and women see these pictures in magazines, on TV, everywhere they look. Always the same message: this is how you should be. Accompanied with those amazing pictures are always articles about how to become that kind of women. A million workouts are thrown around, as if to say: you’re just not working hard enough, here are some more tips on how to become more like this fake picture. 

“To influence a person is to give him one’s own soul. He does not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions. His virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins, are borrowed. He becomes an echo of someone else’s music, an actor of a part that has not been written for him. The aim of life is self-development. To realize one’s nature perfectly – that is what each of us are here for. People are terrified of themselves, nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to one’s self”.[3]

The highest duty is the duty that one owes to one’s self. Then how is it, that in our present day society, all we do is young men and women to change themselves? Go into any convenience store: all the popular magazines will have some sort of similar article presented on the cover: 60 exercises to gain that new summer body. But where are the articles that tell us that it’s okay if you’re not they perfect length, height or weight? Where are the TV-shows who look for women who aren’t the perfect ideal?

The ideal picture of women in the media is under attack. In the last few years, more and more critique has come up against this “ideal”. To many observers, the media appears to be unwittingly engaged in a campaign to make women feel bad about themselves.[4] The negative effect this “ideal” can create exists out of two components: identification and social comparison. Identification is the positive side, while social comparison is the negative element. This is the element in which women compare themselves to the ideal picture presented to them. It is also this effect that causes the harmful effects in men and women alike. And what’s worse? There is almost no variation in the beauty industry. Every model, every item is shown with a gorgeous thin woman: when shopping for big size clothes, they use models with still extremely small sizes! Men and women alike strive to be beautiful, to reach that perfect ideal, even by means of surgery if needed. Some starve themselves, others over-eat. They wear shoes that are too small, some even use corsets to reach that shape that is so advocated. These days, everyone has some goal they wish to reach, and for the most people, that goal is to be beautiful, like that one girl in the commercials. Shiny hair, the right eye colour, longer lashes, a certain shape of facial features, that figure that seems to be “normal”, but no-one actually fits. No-one fits that perfect picture shown in the media, because that picture does not exist. It is created, digitally, altered so that no one ever perfectly fits in. There are celebrities who were once absolutely gorgeous natural woman, that have become completely unrecognisable.[5]

Beauty has always been an important part of society, and by definition it is irreducible to a common denominator. Beauty will always, thankfully, resist our attempts to tie it down too closely, to over-define it.[6] Yet for the last few decades or so, the common picture in the fashion industry has always been of tall, skinny – yet healthy – women, with shiny hair and gorgeous features, striding on huge heels with a flashing bright white smile. And this has become an image so many women and men strive to. By means of plastic surgery, changing your hair, coloured contact lenses, bleaching teeth, corrective clothes and so many more drastic measures, people attempt to change who they are, as Dorian changed who he was, to follow the basic ideal. It does not matter if life is completely useless, as long as it is beautiful. As long as you reach “your beauty goals”, “meet the beauty standards of the fashion industry”, you’ll fit in. What you do, even if it is completely useless, does not matter: as long as you’re beautiful.

One can wonder if this is the lifestyle worth living: is sheer beauty enough to make you feel fulfilled, happy? Isn’t it a matter of one surgery after the other, striving towards great beauty, but emerging even more hideous than when you started out. Sometimes, one neglects himself, moral values, and, just like with Dorian, your mirror shows you the results of your choices. And, like in the book: choices are irreversible. Of course it’s not a shame to choose beauty over usefulness every once in a while, but always stay true to oneself, and never neglect who you are. I believe that is the biggest warning in Oscar Wilde’s book. Beauty and pleasure are important in life, but never forget the person you once were. Dorian went from a small, beautiful, innocent young man to a horrid old creature that no one even recognised or wanted to see. There is a fine line between beauty and horror, the boundaries more often than not a complete blur. Dorian Gray lived what the aesthetics see as a beautiful life, and was able to do so because his painting bore the markings of his life. While pursuing this life, and ignoring his morals, he became hideous. The painting, which showed the horror that was hidden within, was studied behind closed doors. And only when it was destroyed, people saw the horrid creature that the once beautiful Dorian Gray had become. It is the same in our present day beauty industry. So many men and women change themselves, their basic “foundation” by means of plastic surgery. The ideals hold up the idea of a perfect lifestyle. And it is not until those ideals are destroyed, that one can see the horror that lies within.

“The aim of life is self-development. To realize one’s nature perfectly – that is what each one of us is here for”.[7]